Being Gay in Men's Football: An Unwelcoming Atmosphere

“You don't belong on this earth” ... “What are you doing here?” ... “Don't take another breath.”

Since revealing he was gay in 2021, footballer the athlete has received daily death threats and abusive messages on online platforms.

“When I first saw these messages, it broke my heart,” the player states. “Nobody should have to endure such words.

“I'm trying to get better as a player and be the best I can be during matches, and then get put down because of who I am. It's disgusting.”

Midfielder Cavallo was at Adelaide United back in 2020 when he emerged as the sole publicly out elite soccer player in the world.

Recently he left Australia to join lower-tier club Peterborough Sports, who compete before audiences of about 400 in National League North, the sixth tier of the English soccer system.

This young athlete balances his sports career for the semi-professional team by speaking up on LGBTQ+ issues and leveraging his platform - he has more than one million followers on Instagram - to promote fairness and inclusion.

“Definitely, we've got mountains to do,” Cavallo says when asked if football still has a problem with homophobia.

“I don't go more than a week without hearing about an issue.”

‘People want to harm me’

Several years passed for the athlete to build up the bravery to say “I'm gay” before coming out on October 27th, 2021.

“All I want to do is play football and receive fair treatment,” he said in an accompanying video.

The player was twenty-one and making a name for himself at Adelaide United in Australia's top flight when, with the support of his team-mates, he publicly came out.

“The future was uncertain. I had no expectations,” he says. “It felt like the right time in my life. I wanted to take the next step.”

The heartfelt revelation clip, titled ‘His Personal Story’, gained massive attention on digital platforms.

“My phone was flooded with encouraging words. The response was incredible.”

A prominent club were among numerous famous teams around the world to express support for the player, with then manager Jurgen Klopp saying: “I'm really thankful that he did it because it sparks conversation.”

Spanish player the athlete also expressed backing, posting online that “soccer culture is lagging behind and your actions drive progress”, while his former club issued a statement supporting their “extraordinary” and “brave” player.

Some people, however, were not so accepting.

The footballer quickly became a subject to homophobic abuse by rival supporters.

In January 2022 a competing team were penalized A$5,000 over anti-gay abuse from fans directed at the player during a game.

“The things I'd hear were hurtful and derogatory towards LGBTQ people,” he says.

“I remained calm because responding would encourage detractors.”

A scary event occurred at a petrol station in Australia, where Cavallo was assaulted by an individual who identified him from the media attention.

“It was terrifying,” he remembers. “I remember thinking ‘this is real - individuals intend to hurt me’.

“Is it acceptable? Definitely not. But by coming out, these are the consequences.

“My wish is that the next person who reveals their orientation while playing football at a high level doesn't have to experience the path I have experienced.”

Cavallo says the daily death threats and abusive messages have taken a toll on his psychological well-being.

“It's quite sad because I must justify why I belong on the football field for my identity,” he says.

“Heterosexual players aren't questioned and ask ‘why should you exist in football?’.

“A lot of people see me as a smiling, positive person. But sometimes when I rely on my partner, Leighton, and he witnesses much of what occurs privately.”

‘Premier League player coming out would move mountains’

Cavallo's decision to disclose his orientation helped inspire 17-year-old attacking player another athlete to announce he was gay as the UK's only openly gay playing soccer professional in May 2022.

However, there are no openly gay or bisexual players in the Premier League.

“It would create massive change,” says the footballer on the impact a Premier League player revealing their orientation would make.

“But I must be honest. Numerous frightening aspects that would await this individual. Within soccer culture, being an openly gay player is a highly hostile environment.”

Over two decades after Justin Fashanu - the UK's initial out soccer professional - died by suicide in 1998, Cavallo has discussed the “harmful male culture” that still exists in men's football.

“You just need to go to a match and observe the hostile environment and masculinity that the crowd brings,” he says.

“Much remains to be done to make sure there is a secure environment in football for people like myself and Jake.

“We haven't seen it (more players coming out) as frequently as desired.

“My role is to continue advocating for principles I believe in, and strive for eliminating the toxic masculinity in football changing rooms and establishing secure environments.”

‘I'm here to create change’

Cavallo says football has allowed him to have conversations inside dressing rooms about revealing one's orientation.

However, he is critical of soccer's global governing body, after Qatar, where homosexual partnerships are against the law, staged the global tournament in 2022.

Future World Cup is scheduled in another Gulf state, where same-sex attraction is also illegal.

“Do I approve that the World Cup is in countries that criminalise same-sex marriages, where people like me will be put in prison for merely living on that land? It's scary,” states the athlete.

“I get messages [from people living in these countries] saying ‘I face imprisonment for being who I am - can you help me?’.

“It breaks my heart that people are getting locked up for their true selves.

“There are countries that are significant soccer markets and they don't accept LGBTQ+ people. Those are the countries that tend to target me.”

Despite this, Cavallo says he won't cease advocating.

“Soccer has allowed me to start conversations in the locker room. It lets me communicate and inform individuals who seek understanding.

“Not everyone is going to like you for your identity. But I have found my family. I have found my community.

“My mission is to create change. That's my objective.”